As he passed under a bridge he spotted the police officer with a radar gun.

The police officer pulls the guy over with the sarcastic comment 'runway not long enough'
 
The rest of the conversation went something like this!
 
Guy:  'I'm late for work sorry'
 
Copper: What do you do?
 
Guy:  I'm a rectum stretcher
 
Copper: And how does one stretch a rectum?
 
Guy: Well you start of with one lubed fingure and work up to two,then three before you know it i have a whole hand in.
Once I have done this I work in my second hand, this done I stretch it till the arsehole is about 6 feet wide.
 
Copper: And what does one do with a six foot arsehole?
 
Guy: Sit it on a bridge and give it a radar gun
 
 
 
Speeding ticket  £100
 
Court costs £45
 
The look on the coppers face priceless!!